Yesterday I got some bad news. I didn’t get a job that I really wanted, meaning I’m stuck at a job that is both extremely stressful and putting me on a schedule exactly opposite of everyone I love, so that everyone is at work when I’m at home, and asleep when I’m off work. It was a hard blow, and even sent me into a panic attack, which I thought I was over having. It was a really bad day, and I was not happy. I had thought my interview went well. I had prayed and asked God to give me this job. I had done my devotional and worshipped every day. I didn’t understand why I didn’t get the job.
But then my mom told me “do not mourn what was not meant for you” and I realized that while yes, it sucked, that I’m sure there is a greater reason for me not being given the job. Maybe I need to learn to work hard at a job I don’t like. Maybe I would have wrecked the car in the extra drive it would have been. Maybe something bad would have happened in the workplace. Maybe there is something better right around the corner. Who knows?
All I know is that I got up this morning, drank my honey lemon water, put on God of Wonders by Third Day, and opened up my devotional. The rest of my day, I will finish watching The Hobbit:The Battle of Five Armies, do the dishes, drink some coffee, eat something, shower, and go to work. And I will work hard, with a smile on my face, because for whatever reason, God has put me there for however long he wants, and I will do my best to show people His love even when I would rather be somewhere else.
Maybe this is all one big exercise in trusting His plan for me. If so, I think I’m going to do just fine with it.